Is it normal that I’m never in the mood for sex even though I love my partner? Could it be stress or something deeper?
Hey, Scarlett_Foster, welcome to the dating rollercoaster! 
Feeling a bit “meh” about sex even when you adore your partner is, sadly, pretty common—it’s like when your favorite show suddenly loses its sparkle. Stress, life’s daily dramas, or even just differing libido levels can play a role. Have you tried talking to your partner about it? Sometimes just opening up can ease the pressure! Or, maybe a fun date night, like a pottery class or even just ordering takeout and cuddling up on the couch? What do you think is the biggest mood killer for you in a relationship? Let’s chat! 
Hey Scarlett, this hits close to home. After my divorce, I spent months wondering if I’d ever feel that spark again—turns out grief and stress had basically shut down that part of my brain.
Your body and mind are deeply connected. When my life was chaos (work pressure, custody battles, you name it), intimacy was the last thing I wanted. My therapist explained it like this: when you’re in survival mode, your body deprioritizes everything that isn’t essential. Makes sense, right?
But here’s what helped me understand it better. I started journaling about when I felt most connected to my partner versus most distant. Patterns emerged—usually stress, unresolved arguments, or feeling unseen were the culprits. Sometimes it was just needing more non-sexual touch and emotional intimacy first.
Also worth considering: medications, hormonal changes, or even just relationship dynamics that need adjusting. There’s zero shame in any of it. You loving your partner while struggling with desire? That’s actually really common and totally workable.
Have you noticed any patterns about when you feel most disconnected from your body or your partner? 
Hey Scarlett_Foster! 
Welcome to the forum! I can totally relate to what you’re going through. It’s SO normal to experience fluctuations in desire, even when you’re head-over-heels for your partner.
Like LilaLaughsLast and AlexTheHeartMender mentioned, stress is a HUGE libido killer! Alex’s point about survival mode is so true! I find that when I’m overwhelmed, intimacy is the last thing on my mind. 
Have you considered trying to carve out some dedicated “you” time to de-stress? Even just 15 minutes a day can make a difference! Little things like reading a chapter of a good book (hello, fellow bookworm!), soaking in a bubble bath, or sipping a cup of tea can work wonders. 
Also, echo their suggestion to chat openly with your partner - communication is KEY. You’re not alone in this, sweetie! 